Alright, so I’ll be honest. Kind of.
In the past when I’ve been asked to contribute to someone else’s blog I’ve pretty much just regurgitated something I’ve written before. Because being original more than once in a row is like trying to sneeze without peeing after you’ve had a baby. You guys KNOW what I’m talking about.
But the loverly Pamela…or @Vampiresmitten on Twitter (where in case you were wondering we do wonderful things together like talk about our boobs and plot world domination) forbid me from re-using a past post. Which is sad…because I was going to use the one where I call Martha Stewart a dirty whore. Whatever. Her loss right?
Oh…did I introduce myself? Crap. SEE? This is what happens when I have to be original. Alright, so HELLO THERE I’m Holly…I write over at www.whymomdrinksrum.net and www.boobemancipation.com <that is the one where women post photos of their boobs. I think it might bring peace to the Middle East & stuff.
I thought about what I could write for Pamela. Something meaningful? Something insightful? But why would I change who I am? So…this is what you get.
We have a 12 year old daughter. She was given a subtle suggestion by her parents that joining one of the school’s sports teams might be a good idea. Acutally she was told that if she didn’t she would be running a high risk of becoming some sort of cookie-selling clone in a uniform. You know….because the alternative is she’ll be a drug using prostitute. Probably. I left that last part out though.
She opted for the sports option.
On a side note: Yes, I did use the words ‘cookie selling clone’. I also might have told her, “Boys are icky because they sweat from their crotches.” over the same meal. To be fair? That second glass of wine was a really sneaky bitch. Whatever…I’m trying to avoid becoming a Grandma within the next decade.
So last week she came home and told us Tuesday and Thursday she would be taking the late bus home because…wait for it….she joined wrestling. Yes. Wrestling. One the one hand I’m proud she is interested in kicking ass with skill (wipes prideful tear from eye) – but on the other?…wrestling? I’m honestly conflicted in the brain on this one.
At least she won’t be using drugs.
Unless it’s steriods.
Fuck.
Our son still refuses any and all organized sports. Living up here in the ‘great white North’ he should be in hockey. But he has weak ankles – according to the donkey-like whining he did when we put him in skates. And he doesn’t like soccer because nobody gives him the ball. You know…like they won’t hand it to him. Bastards. So for him we have one hope – military service. Because as much as I love him….jails are smelly.
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Tags: guest, school activities, whymomdrinksrum
Oooh, wrestling. Hopefully at 12 years old they’re not emphasizing the weight part of it. My sister (who is gorgeous, slender, tall, party-girl type) wrestled & was forever having to obsess about the food she ate and whether she’d “make weight”. I hated it
Tatiana´s last blog ..GTT: Vices
Ah yes–understood from the mother of a gifted athlete who gave it all up to nearly fail out of school. Well, now he’s decided to follow in my footsteps and the military it is. Besides, he’s got too pretty of a mouth to be in jail…
Janie Woods´s last blog ..Die Hard Fan